Sorry, I somehow missed the untranslated text when I went through. I took my best shot at the last sentence, but the one remaining to be translated (ハイライト消えてる割にものすごく普通ぽい) is beyond me. It has something to do with highlights disappearing in a very ordinary or regular way or something like that, but it makes almost no sense, so I'm not even going to venture a guess as to the true meaning.
It's 無印, not 無E|. I think SLB in Nanoha stands for Starlight Breaker, but I'm not sure. I'm afraid I can't offer a better translation though. Anything LaC couldn't translate is far beyond me.
Thanks for finding the proper kanji for 印, I had looked and couldn't find it. Since "無印" means unbranded or unlabled, doesn't that change the translation to "Like a Fate soon to have her SLB unbranded"? Does that even make sense?
Actually, it's the ハイライト line that really had me stumped: 割に implies contrast, but I couldn't see how a lack of highlights could be in contrast with being 普通. Now that you've made me go over it again, I finally realized the very specific meaning of [目の]ハイライトが消えてる. Thanks for figuring out what SLB means, too. I went and redid the whole translation, so check it out.
Bad art qualityStiff poseProper art directionIn spite of those eyes without pupils, it feels awfully ordinaryWRONGLooks like Fate just before a generic SLB!Boing boing
onomatopoeia of big, bouncy breastsTattered Barrier JacketMaimai's panting
Maimai is a nickname fans use for Mai Nakahara, Teana's voice actressRIGHT