When I saw the thumbnail I was like "wait, that looks familiar". LAMO. I guess it wasn't the pizza guy

"I told you for god knows how many times already that the spare key is under the flower, pot, outside, the door! Goddamnit this is the third time already this week!"

OMGkillitwithfire said:

"I told you for god knows how many times already that the spare key is under the flower, pot, outside, the door! Goddamnit this is the third time already this week!"

One of my friends has a pothead brother who when he came to visit would shim a window open, cut a hole through the screen and tumble inside the bathroom and pass out even though he had the code to the house. He was also the kind of guy who would key his own car as he tried to unlock it. Needless to say, my friend greets him with "Welcome, now take your things and gtfo."

Me: "Yes I'm home! So is my Beretta M9 Suppressed!" *B-BL-BLAM!!*
*Hot-Yandere-chan drops dead*

Me: (Places gun back in holster and drags body pass front door and slams it. Then stabs her in the brain stem for just in case. Then goes to his kitchen cabinet under the sink.)
*Knock! Knock!*
Me:(Stands up and draws pistol and answers the front door to meet a pink haired female cop) "Officer Gasai."

Gasai: "Hey (yournamehere) neighbors called in about hearing gun shots? *Her eyes drift down to the floor in her view.* You working again?
Me: *turns to look* "Negotiations fell apart."
Gasai:"Well, don't make a mess again okay?"
Me: "Be safe Gasai."*Closes door*

LOCKS ARE JUST OBSTRUCTIONS TO LOVE.

ezekill said:

LOCKS ARE JUST OBSTRUCTIONS TO LOVE.

Just like those girls you were talking to yesterday...

Random_Fanguy said:

Just like those girls you were talking to yesterday...

They were just being a little tsundere. I guess they were so touched and embarrassed that I took the time out of my busy schedule to unplug the toaster they left on. Those things can cause a fire you know? Good thing I put up those cameras. Its a dangerous world out there, who knows what kind of misfortune could fall upon a cute innocent girl living alone~

*DV-110 Form intensifies*

USS_Brony_Alicorn said:

Me: "Yes I'm home! So is my Beretta M9 Suppressed!" *B-BL-BLAM!!*
*Hot-Yandere-chan drops dead*

Me: (Places gun back in holster and drags body pass front door and slams it. Then stabs her in the brain stem for just in case. Then goes to his kitchen cabinet under the sink.)
*Knock! Knock!*
Me:(Stands up and draws pistol and answers the front door to meet a pink haired female cop) "Officer Gasai."

Gasai: "Hey (yournamehere) neighbors called in about hearing gun shots? *Her eyes drift down to the floor in her view.* You working again?
Me: *turns to look* "Negotiations fell apart."
Gasai:"Well, don't make a mess again okay?"
Me: "Be safe Gasai."*Closes door*

Weren't you told to stop those made-up dialogues :<?

So... it's not the pizza guy, huh?