Ban ponytails because it arouses sexual desires?

"If you young men can't keep your eyes to yourself, we can help you." *holds up rusty spoon in one hand, while pointing a gun at the boy's head with the other.*

I'm sure that rule was made up so teachers don't lust over girl student's necks. Probably some old geezer though of this rule believing students lust over the last thing they ever look in a girl... except an old geezer.

Well, I really don't want to be that guy, but the other four posts from this artist basically went untranslated and this one was gotten to on the spot. Is there any chance any of them could get translated?